What's the best way to recover from a bad first date?

SurfersMatch members weighed in on this question. Here’s what 1,265 people had to say.

recover from a bad first date

The Winner

Top answer
Pause and reflect on what went wrong
42.4% of votes — 536 out of 1,265

Poll Results

Pause and reflect on what went wrong
42.4%
536
Laugh it off with friends
24.1%
305
Get online and find the next one!
12.7%
161
Give them a second chance
12.0%
152
Go out and treat yourself!
8.8%
111

Demographics: Gender Breakdown per Answer

Pause and reflect on what went wrong
Gender breakdown
Men
75.7%
Women
24.1%
Couples
0.0%
Other
0.2%
Laugh it off with friends
Gender breakdown
Men
57.7%
Women
42.0%
Couples
0.0%
Other
0.3%
Get online and find the next one!
Gender breakdown
Men
71.4%
Women
28.0%
Couples
0.0%
Other
0.6%
Give them a second chance
Gender breakdown
Men
84.9%
Women
13.8%
Couples
0.0%
Other
1.3%
Go out and treat yourself!
Gender breakdown
Men
61.3%
Women
38.7%
Couples
0.0%
Other
0.0%

Demographics: Age Distribution (All Voters)

18–24
2.5%
25–34
9.5%
35–44
16.0%
45–54
22.5%
55–64
24.7%
65+
24.9%

What the Data Shows

The most popular recovery strategy after a bad first date is to pause and reflect (42.4%) — a mature, self-aware response that fits a community of adults who take connection seriously. Rather than rushing to the next option or venting to friends, the majority prefers to understand what happened before moving on.

Laughing it off with friends came second at 24.1% — the social circuit-breaker that turns a cringe story into a bonding moment. Getting back online immediately (12.7%) and giving them a second chance (12.0%) are the more action-oriented responses, chosen by a quarter of members combined.

Treating yourself after a rough date — the smallest category at 8.8% — is still a healthy impulse. What’s most striking is that ghosting or avoidance isn’t even an option people suggested: the implicit assumption is that bad dates are part of the journey, not catastrophes. This is a resilient community.

This poll received 1,265 responses from SurfersMatch members. Demographics are self-reported. Poll published January 15, 2025.

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